Darynka, 16, Kalush


My alarm clock from the mobile phone, as usual, only led to the realization that today came, December 13. In fact, I woke up more intuitively several minutes before its friendly ringing: the capitals of the countries of the world were troubling me this night from under my pillow, the capitals I had to remember by all means for my Geography lesson. Long before the morning, I virtually appeared in this or that country of the world. I woke up, for the memories, dreams were haunting me because in my sleep I have already believed I am – a man of the world and the world is fascinated by me, and I am fascinated by it! And, unfortunately, the voice-clock phone turned me into reality – from under the pillow there there looked only summaries in geography. Well, the day has just begun, and you must be bold!

While putting books in a bag, I felt indescribable emptiness inside. I do not know how to describe this phenomenon (quite accurately it’s described in “Harry Potter” by J. K. Rowling). You really feel emptiness inside and it is connected with the realization that you had been studying long after midnight and you didn’t learn anything. Fear captivated my soul and inoculated doubt about the successful implementation of my capabilities. But the lost time can’t be returned, and I must go on living, struggling, because life is eternal struggle…

In general, Tuesday the thirteenth began normally, yes, like all other days, but my soul foretold new-old problems at school. On the way to school I, as usual, was talking with my mum on the phone, sharing my plans for the day, and as it turned out later, do not plan anything for things planed beforehand can never be fully realized.

I stepped over the threshold of the Grammar School and felt butterflies in my stomach. I went to pass a test, and for a moment forgot about my mental anguish (problems do concern me, even without sufficient reason, though …) By the way, soon after the second lesson, I began to call obvious things into question: Today is Tuesday, 13th – this is Friday the 13th (superstitious Ukrainians believe it’s unhappy). And so it lasted till 4. 00 p.m.

Meanwhile my thoughts were tearing me inside. They often invade my mind when I lose, it seems, the most important thing – faith in myself.

I came to a silent dorm room. I got used to its silence. Thoughts again rushed through my head. I got deeper in analytical reasoning about the events of the 13th…

First I started to think about the injustice of this world, and eventually convinced myself that, in fact, everything is not as bad as it seems to be, that the pain of injustice is not a real pain: it hurts those who are in despair (disabled, cancer patients), left to live a few days, hours, minutes, seconds, moments… And you just realise that soon they won’t see this world any more. And ME! It’s sometimes even funny, I suffer from such nonsense…

I conclude that whatever the day, a Christian holiday, St. Andrew’s Day, (and every day!) do not think about bad… Although life is unpredictable, anything can happen to anyone, you should dream… positively and proudly with your head raised… go ahead. And if somebody tells me dreams collapse, I won’t not agree. They can come true if you love and struggle for them. They’ll multiply if you overcome your greatest enemy – DOUBT! The case is not in the 13th of December, but in you!


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